Dear Phil Collins,

I was simply stunned recently by the image of you drumming for a HEAVY METAL band. Who ever would’ve thought that the illustrious Phil Collins would get behind the skins for Ozzy Osbourne and Tony Iommi of Black Sabbath? I sure didn’t, but if it made the Queen happy on her Golden Jubilee, then you should probably be congratulated for your patriotic sacrifice.  You’re welcome, Queen E!

It got me to thinking, though. Maybe you could stand to learn a thing or two from Mr. Osbourne. He’s had an incredibly successful “third act” in his career thanks to the reality television program “The Osbournes.” I bet you could really get back in the public eye again by doing something similar, although you could use a Sharon and kids with funny hair. If you don’t like that idea, how about becoming a judge on a television talent show? Sort of like a cross between Simon Cowell and Paula Abdul only more talented and less cranky.

Think about it.

Trying To Help,

Your Fan.