Dear Phil Collins,

Man, how come your name never comes up when people talk about blue-eyed soul?  Van Morrison and Rod Stewart got nuffin’ on you.   I remember hearing “You Can’t Hurry Love” when I was young and it was like the Supremes never existed!  I know you probably don’t want to get pigeonholed but that’s just another way the Man is keeping you down — you’ve got to get your propers. 

Oh, and I know how some people think it’s uncool to like your later stuff, but like the song “Two Hearts” that you did is another totally awesome R&B number.  To the haters out there, I say “step off” because you know what?  Phil wrote that song with none other than Lamont Dozier, of Holland-Dozier-Holland fame.  You know, those guys the Magnetic Fields “name dropped” in their song “The Death of Franz Ferdinand”?  That’s, as they say, “the real deal.”  You go, Phil.

So Into You,

Green-Eyed Fan.